July 28, 2017

5 Tips on How to Communicate with your Ex in a Family Law Case

At the Springs Law Group, we handle a variety of Family Law matters including divorce with or without children, legal separation, child custody, child support cases, and many others. A constant question among all of these cases is, “How do I talk to the other side?” In this article, we want to provide some useful tips on how to effectively talk to the opposing side in a Family Law Case.

Think before you make a phone call, text or email

What we mean by this is that often parties immediately react to the opposing side’s phone calls, texts or emails. This can be problematic because the initial reaction is usually an emotional reaction. If you have the chance to walk away for a bit before you respond, we highly recommend this as it will give you time to process your thoughts and compose an effective response instead of an emotional response.

Take the high road

Often parties resort to trading insults in their communications with each other. At the end of the day, this does not benefit either party or their children, if the parties have children. Our advice is to always take the high road when communicating with the other side. The benefit of this is that as you stay positive in your communications, it may shift the general tone of the conversation, it may help your relationship with the other side, it may help avoid conflict, and you will have nothing to stress about if you take the high road.

Follow Court Orders

If you have prior Court Orders, follow those in your communications. If you have a Temporary Orders, Separation Agreement, or a Parenting Plan, reference the Order in your communications to the other side. Always be the party that is following the Court Order. If there are disagreements between the parties, refer back to the Court Order before you act and respond to the specific section of the Court Order. We always advise our clients to follow Court Orders.

Keep your responses short

We recommend that when you respond to the opposing party in a Family Law matter, you make your response clear and to the point. The reason for this is to stay focused, but also to prevent our clients from going off on tangents that could ultimately come back to hurt them in Court. By keeping your response short, you avoid putting your foot in your mouth.

Talk to your attorney

At times, you may need to speak with your Family Law attorney before you respond. We highly recommend this. We would rather our clients talk to us before they respond to the opposing side on their own. We prefer that our clients ask for suggestions on how to respond. You cannot unring a bell. As Family Law Attorneys, we care about your case and one of our jobs is to protect our clients. We would rather our clients talk to us before they say or write something they may regret at a later date.

If you are having difficulty communicating with the opposing side in your Family Law case or have questions about your case, please contact the attorneys at Springs Law Group LLC at to schedule a free initial consultation.

Christopher Nicolaysen is a Family law Attorney who practices in Colorado Springs, CO. He graduated from Denver Sturm College of Law, and has been practicing law for several years now. Christopher Nicolaysen is passionate about helping you solve your family matters. Learn more about his experience here.

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